I come from an old-school Eastern European family that takes the whole “you’re a guest in my house” thing very, very seriously. If you’re coming over, there’s going to be a full meal ready for you and a variety of drink options. If you need a change of clothes, it’s there for you. Wanna shower or need to take a nap or even stay the night? That’s an option, too.
Some people might think that’s overkill, but in many cultures, that kind of gung-ho attitude towards making a guest feel comfortable is a two-way street. When I’m a guest in someone else’s home, I’ll keep any requests I have to an absolute minimum and make sure to clean up after myself and be as polite as possible. It’s all about manners at the end of the day.
However, that ideal’s lost on some people for whatever reason. The contributors to this AskReddit shared some of the worst examples they’ve ever come across of the much-maligned “ungracious guest.”
1. Break the knife.
Not only did this guy’s ex-wife’s sister break a “$150 chef’s knife” but, after messing it up, she said “it must be a cheap knife because her sister in Thailand cuts them open super easy with a cleaver.” He counts not having to deal with her again as a bright side of his divorce.
2. Hair. Hair everywhere.
This unfortunate soul let a neighbor and her two daughters use their shower after her husband had neglected to pay the water bill. When they went into the bathroom after they left they noticed the “bathtub was clogged with…hair”. A specific kind of hair that was “all over…the sides of the tub, bottom of the shower curtain, everywhere.”
Which left this bathroom Mother Theresa to think that their neighbor “decided to change her hairstyle from 1970’s Hustler to Y2K Penthouse…”
3. Ex In-Laws
This person’s in-laws hated them so much that when they invited them over for Thanksgiving, they seriously asked them “to leave and come back a few hours later because they wanted to ‘follow their tradition of preparing the meal alone as a family’.”
No wonder they’re ex in-laws now.
4. All over the toilet seat.
After inviting a bunch of kids over for a swimming party, this host kid went to the bathroom right after a young girl. What they saw on the toilet seat horrified them: “She had pooped all over the toilet seat and didn’t even try to clean it. It wasn’t just a little, it was everywhere and let me tell you that girl needed more fiber in her diet.”
Thankfully, the young girl’s mother forced her to clean it up, but still. Why would you think that’s OK in the first place?
5. Hardwood floors?
A guest at a house-warming party was really interested in knowing whether or not the floors were hardwood or laminate. So they decided “to test it out by taking out their key and scratching the floor. It was hardwood and it left a scratch…”
I wouldn’t be surprised if they were never invited back for another party.
6. Who wants some blow?
Some random guy showed up at this person’s house party claiming to be a friend of a guest who didn’t even show up anyway. He brought a bunch of blow to the party, but no one else wanted to do any, and he ends up pulling a knife on the host’s friend. “I tell him he needs to leave, he points the knife to me, everyone surrounds him, he leaves. I don’t remember his name but he was the worst guest I’ve ever had and hopefully will ever have over.”
7. Free food critic.
This person and their roommate decided to host weekly dinners for their friends and co-workers every Monday. Every week the same random dude showed up that the host wasn’t at all familiar with, and even though they didn’t like this random guy, they didn’t let it bother them. That was, until one night they cooked “al dente” pasta Mr. Random ended up not liking: “‘This is the most under-cooked pasta I’ve ever had, it tastes terrible, someone needs to show you how to cook pasta.'”
The host ended up canceling their weekly dinners and thought it was pretty tacky for the guy to complain about free food. “Personally I would never ever say anything bad about someone’s cooking as a guest at their house even if it was terrible.”
8. Pad flushing.
If you’re over somebody’s house and they ask you not to anything but toilet paper down the toilet, you should listen to them. Unfortunately, this host’s relatives did not, and it ended up destroying their “septic field” and costing them “almost $10,000 in damages overall. When confronted, they just denied it, despite the fact that the 32 pads that were pulled out of the system matches the brand that they had while they were over.”
9. Visit from Grandma.
When this person’s Grandma visited from out of state to catch her high school graduation, she ended up overstaying her welcome by two weeks and “threw a fit” whenever the newly graduated young’un slept “past 9am.” To top it all off, she told her mom that “she needed to work less so she could clean the house better.”
10. Room pooper.
Imagine you have a bunch of friends and acquaintences in your house. Then, because the bathroom is full, one of the guests decides to go and poop in your room instead of waiting for the toilet to free up. The host just thought the kid “needed to go pretty bad” and I agree with them.
11. Get outta bed, kid.
When this person was a kid, they had a fever while their grandpa was visiting. After eating lunch, the poor little kid “crawled back into [their] bed,” only to be “kicked…out of [their] bed” by their Grandpa who decided he wanted to have a nap.
After the poster’s mom found him “laying on the floor next to [the] bed” they kicked Grandpa out of the house.
When you invite someone into your home as a kid, there’s a certain pact, that whatever happens in the house, the parents can’t know about. But this guest violated that rule when they “looked at [OP’s] search history and saw [they] had watched” some entertainment that was unfit for children’s eyes. They then proceeded to call their mom “from downstairs to tell her about it.”
Worst. Guest. Ever.
13. Ex husband at the door.
This dude’s wife’s ex-husband stayed at their house for ten days, much to the excitement of his 10-year-old biological daughter. “While living with [them, he] broke a sandstone wedding present” but they “never badmouthed him, just swallowed it all, with a sanguine smile.”
They assumed he’d get a hotel, but made the whole situation awkward for everyone involved. The good news is that the guy’s daughter thanked OP at the end of the day for never talking bad about her father, she just realized how much he sucked on her own. So that’s a win.